Relationship Counselling Online Relationship, marriage and individual counselling and psychotherapy online via Zoom, Skype and the phone

Alcohol and Binge Eating. Kate

Counsellor and English speaking online therapist working with alcohol and binge eating disorder via Zoom, Skype, Signal and the phone. Includes clients in the UK and living abroad.

What is addiction to you?

.... an illness?
.... a symptom?
.... a coping strategy?
.... escapism?
.... a disease?
.... a result of trauma?

My honest answer is that it really does not matter what you feel alcohol or binge eating disorder is as the fact you are here means it is causing you a problem. The most important thing right now is that you get the help you need.


Is addiction choice?
There can be much shame linked to alcohol and food use and people can think it is choice. To shatter that illusion; if you are active in your addiction you have lost choice as the substance (coping mechanism) will be picking you up long before you pick it up as it is now integrated in your way of life; a mental obsession. And, chances are, once you start you will not be able to stop.


Why use?
So how have you learnt to soothe yourself when you are feeling at dis-ease in your internal world? When you feel you are bad or unlovable or maybe feel worthless? Substances can be used as a coping mechanism for unpleasant emotions such as sadness, rage or anger.

As a child you will have needed two things in relationship; attachment and authenticity. If you did not receive these you may find you are unable to express yourself. You will have learnt ways to stay in relationship at any cost to you. What this then means is that you find ways to escape the uncomfortableness and longing you feel on the inside which is why the relief given by your drug of choice is so important; it gives you a dopamine hit which gives you temporary oblivion. This then becomes problematic as the more you fix through using, the more that is needed to have the same impact as, after that first fix, your body 'craves' more.


Alcohol Addiction or Alcoholic?


Alcohol and Binge Eating. AlcoholProblem

If you have crossed the line with your drinking and find when you now take that first drink you can not stop then the chances are you may be an alcoholic (which is a disease, not choice). To have an alcohol addiction it is not about how much you drink, it is about why you drink. What is known is that if you are alcohol dependent you will not be able to safely drink as the first drink will get you drunk where as heavy drinkers and social drinkers can stop.

Do not let shame stop you from getting the help you need today.

Click here to view an article I wrote on 'could you be an alcoholic or addict?'


Binge Eating Disorder


Alcohol and Binge Eating. BED

Maybe the only way you feel you can control what is happening in your life and you binge eat to manage feelings, i.e. trying to keep 'down' what wants to come 'up'. Or your eating has a disordered pattern to it which may resemble how you live life. Or does it form part of a deeper compulsive pattern? Or add an element of control for you in a world that seems out of contol?

Whatever the reason, in therapy we will look at the root cause to help you to have choice today over what you eat and how you eat it. After all, we need food to live so it is about finding a healthier relationship with food.

Click here to view an article I wrote on 'Are you struggling with food issues/binge eating disorder?'


How will counselling and psychotherapy help?

The very nature of the therapeutic relationship means there is acceptance and that you are seen for who you are. Therapy offers a space where you will not be judged. Infact, quite the opposite, you will be able to engage in your own narrative story and to empty out all that you feel on the inside which you feel is keeping you from being who you really are.

This could be linked to feelings such as resentment, shame, rage, guilt etc. Or it could be that you feel that you are not deservant of a good life and, as others abandoned / rejected you, you are now abandoning / rejecting yourself. Well I want to say; you are deservant of a good life. You are deservant of recovery. You are deservant of a life worth living.

We will look at the addiction cycle, amongst other things, the elements of which are: -

Dormant (the 'driver' of the cycle as it is what you are escaping from)

Trigger (the 'thing' that starts the cycle, again, i.e. emptiness, not feeling enough, wanting to change the way you feel, refeeling old hurts, self-anielation, etc.)

Preparation (this is what happens as you prepare to use alcohol / food, i.e. buying)

Acting-out (the actual drinking or eating itself)

Regret (the 'after' feeling once you realise you have done it again)

Rebuilding (life goes back to normal for a while with the 'dormant' part starting to build again).

The cycle repeats....and repeats....and repeats.

(Addiction Cycle, Dr Paula Hall)

There IS hopeYou CAN recover from alcoholism and binge eating disorder if you are prepared to make a few changes in your life.

Alcohol and Binge Eating. HOPE

Contact

Contact from website
Click here to contact me and please include the appointment time you are enquiring about.

Email Contact

Email [email protected]

Text / WhatsApp / Telephone Contact

Contact 07941 305511 to make an appointment.

Please leave a message and I will get back to you as soon as I am able.

Note that if your telephone number is unfamiliar to me, and you do not leave a message, I will not call you back as I am unaware of your individual situation.

I confirm that both my email account and voicemail are password protected and only accessible by me.

Not ready yet?

That is absolutely ok yet there is a saying 'nothing changes if nothing changes' so only by being brave and courageous will you experience change. I am happy to be alongside you why you transition.

Please know I work in Private Practice Monday - Friday and I will get back to you within these times.


A quote for reflection....

‘Trauma is not what happens to you. Trauma is what happens inside of you, as a result of what happened to you. Underneath the traumatised persona is a healthy individual who has never found expression in his/her life'.
Dr Gabor Mate


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